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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]He wants to make a change to your financial arrangement and this is how he’s bringing it up. It’s not great. He gets a C-.

If you love him, I would say “hey, I’m fine with us sharing expenses equally but I don’t love this dynamic where you tell me what to buy, can we talk about it?”

See how he handles that. There are endless apps and things you could use to track and split costs. [/quote]

I would give his approach a D-  This is a hard no because it is passive aggressive and takes for granted her time/money/schedule instead.  You don’t sign someone else up for their time or money without asking them and you certainly don’t do it out in public.  If there is an underlying issue, it needs to be approached directly. Can you imagine with kids if your spouse makes a decision that they will take on x, therefore you take on y without discussing it and says it after they’ve done their part?  The answer isn’t necessarily an app to make it easier it’s to first discuss what someone feels is imbalanced before it crosses over into resentment and talk thru possibilities.  Who knows of OP even wants to go to expensive dinners on the regular when looking at where they want to spend their discretionary income.

As the OP I would address it directly about what’s going on and the dynamic about telling you what you will do based on his decision of what he’s decided to do is not okay.  And if it does get to topic of shared expenses, first- I would want to understand between “no woman should pay for me” to “you got the next one babe” shift.  Honestly that sounds like the type of guy that talks the talk of being a provider but would be the first in line looking for alimony if you ever made more than him.  Second  because he makes significantly more than you, any shared expenses need to be proportional.[/quote]

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