Reply to I filed for divorce today and feel awful

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Reply to "I filed for divorce today and feel awful"

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[quote=Anonymous]People are acting like the only choice is a miserable marriage or a divorce.

There is a third choice, and that is a functional, more stable, happier marriage. That takes work though. A PP mentioned people are afraid of divorce. With a 50% divorce rate, I'm thinking that is not the case. I think people are afraid to do the work required to get to a happier marriage.

People post a lot about needs not being met, but what have you done to empower your spouse to meet your needs? Getting your needs met is your responsiblty. It requires putting someone else first at times, even when you don't want to. It requires communicating in a mature way. It requires not be selfish. It requires opening yourself up when it's really, really hard, because you could get really, really hurt, or rejected, abandoned, all those core emotions that are at the root of every petty argument, eye roll, sarcastic remark.

I've been there. I'm there now. I didn't get here because I know it all, but the pain got so bad, I am learning. I am being forced after hitting rock bottom, to realize that it takes two people to make or break a marriage, and I'm one of those two. [/quote]

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