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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She left the sick kid out of the party, so no germs were present inside the party, and you wanted an elderly disabled man to come to you? 
YIKES even if you apologized I'd be really angry at you. [/quote]

NP. "No germs were present at the party"? You don't understand how viruses spread. OP was right to assume it was likely that the parents of a kid with flu might themselves be already infected with flu at that party and just not symptomatic yet. This is exactly how illness spreads.

OP, while, yes, you should not have asked for the cake to be cut outside etc , the bigger issue is you shouldn't have been there at all, and the biggest issue is not SIL (who is being a bratty baby now after you rightly and clearly apologized). The biggest issue is DH pressuring you to come over at all. For an adult birthday party, FFS. One for which you and he had already made a different arrangement. You and he need to talk about why he even asked. Is he a "But it's faaamilllyyy" person? Do his relatives expect you both at every single event? If so, time to discuss how a good plan ended up going so wrong. BTW, I hope your kid stayed healthy and did well on that exam![/quote]

+1. SIL needs to grow up. Her reaction is what caused a scene, not you checking to see if the cake could be cut outside unless blatantly obviuos physical mobility limitations (full body cast) FFS.[/quote]

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