Reply to If your parents lived amicably and then divorced while you were in college, how did you do?

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Reply to "If your parents lived amicably and then divorced while you were in college, how did you do?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, you *think* everything will be fine when you split, amicable about sharing child time and expenses, etc. But your imagination does not include new partners and step-relatives and everything that entails, including [b]competition for resources[/b]. You also have no idea how your kid will deal with all of this, what happens as she ages and you age, how to split holidays, etc. I think you sound like you live in a future fantasy world.

You should consider all the people on this thread who have suggested trying to address your current issues, instead of just accepting them as a fact set in stone. If you can connect and develop emotional intimacy again, you may both be willing to make compromises 15 years from now. You must have been in love on your wedding day, right? Sounds like there is a real foundation here to build from.[/quote]

This. Divorce opens the door to a lot of complexity and a lot of compromise. There are many, many reasons you and your child might not come out of this any happier, even if your marriage does kinda stink.[/quote]

A lot of unknown people that your kid will have to possibly spend holidays with, maybe different ones each year. Other kids being brought into the house, etc. Especially financially, but emotionally too, this is often true that things may not be better. The grass being greener is real. And it's not just for 18/21 years but your adult kid will feel pulled between 3-4 houses of grandparents on holidays, will feel more burdened by aging parents who are alone, etc. Families exist for a lot of reasons beyond romance. [/quote]

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