Reply to Send Mom to nursing home?

Forum Index » Eldercare

Reply to "Send Mom to nursing home? "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] 
 OP, you are right to find a safe home for her. I love it when people say 'hire help'. Have they actually TRIED to hire help? It's very difficult, and then hopefully they will actually show up. Easy for sister to say 'hire help'...she's not the one who has to handle everything when help does not come.[/quote]

I had this kind of situation with my father and was the sibling saying “let’s hire help.” In reality, we absolutely couldn’t get the in-home help we needed for the same price as assisted living care.

And, if and when your father needs help getting up even to get into a wheelchair, it’s super hard for female laypeople who don’t do that regularly to do that well on their own.

I slept on an air mattress in my dad’s memory care unit the last week of his life. The social scene for patients there who knew what was going on was not great, but my dad had only a vague idea of what was going on, and it was fine for him in his situation.

The food was so so, but he didn’t eat the great food I got delivered any more than he ate the so so good.

Kind people came in to check on him all the time. They were much better at talking to him and getting him to do necessary things than I was. They gave him a choice about whether to stay in his room of came out but were good at trying to get him out.

So, facility care could simply be better for your dad as well as easier on you. If necessary, hold costs down by finding a place out of town.

But, conversely, hospice-managed death was not dramatic and scary. My dad just glided to an end. So, if you keep your mother at home and have hospice help, end of life might not be especially traumatic[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics