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Reply to "Why has silence become an acceptable response to invitations, questions, etc.?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just in the last week or so . . . . Asked a friend if her daughter would ever be interested in babysitting, because I need to add to my roster. No response. Which could mean no. Or it could mean any number of things that I can only guess because absent a “no” nothing is clear. YOU SHOULD ASK THE DAUGHTER DIRECTLY. Asked some neighbors if they wanted to attend something (I have an extra ticket), and specifically asked for a response one way or the other because the event is soon. The first response was a generic emoji that didn’t actually answer. I followed up two days later and I got a “checking “ response. Several days later, still no answer so I found someone else. Still never heard back from my neighbor - for all I know they plan to attend and I’ll get a text from them the day of asking about it! IF YOU NEEDED TO KNOW BY A DEADLINE, YOU SHOULD HAVE SET A DEADLINE WITH THEM . IT’S UNCLEAR WHAT YOU MEAN BY “ASKED”. IF YOU MEAN THAT YOU TEXTED — THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE STATED AN RSVP DATE. IF YOU “ASKED” VERBALLY, THEN YOUR WRITTEN REMINDER SHOULD HAVE INCLUDED A DEADLINE. YES, THEY SHOULD RESPOND, BUT THEY HAVE NO WAY OF KNOWING IF YOUR “SOON” IS THE SAME AS THEIRS. Sent a message to my book club asking if anyone wanted to join me doing something. Got one yes, great. Got another response from someone who was busy but otherwise interested. Also great - at least have an understanding about this person. Zero response from everyone else. So again, I’m left to guess. Did they just not like the activity? Interested but busy? Who knows. YOU ASKED A GENERAL QUESTION OF A GROUP OF PEOPLE. EXPECT THAT THE PEOPLE WHO WILL CONTACT YOU WILL BE THE PEOPLE WHO ARE INTERESTED. IF YOU HAVE QUESTIONS, ASK THEM IN A CONVERSATION — AND RECOGNIZE THAT YOUR PRIORITIES AND TIMELINES ARE NOT UNIVERSALLY SHARED. WTF? No wonder there are so many people who feel lonely, isolated , disassociated, etc. No one can bother to put in bare minimum effort to communicate. And so many people think that it’s okay to just forget to respond. No, it’s not, it’s rude. To leave it to someone else to have to follow up or wonder what you’re thinking, when all you need to do is spend 5 seconds typing “no thank you “ or “no, I’m not interested “ is not okay! It’s one thing thing to get busy and be delayed in responding. Or to use silence as a response with someone who can’t accept boundaries or take “no” as an answer. But why is it socially acceptable to drop the ball in all manner of communication? [/quote] See CAPS for responses to your situations. You’re over generalizing. You’re also not communicating clearly. If you want a certain kind of response by a specific deadline— it’s on you to tell people that. [/quote]
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