Reply to Was having kids worth the risk it took on your looks?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]For me, there was no question.  I always wanted kids and am happy to have them.  I also got lucky and got two awesome kids.

But, seriously, if you are even asking this question, just don't have kids.  Your priorities are screwed up.  If you were asking about risks to your -health- and the changes that can happen with pregnancy to your health, that would be one thing.  But your looks?  Nope.   Don't have kids.  Just do what you do best and focus on yourself.[/quote]

Disagree, it's a fine question to ask. Your looks are part of who you are, and feeling upset about your changing body is a really common effect of pregnancy and parenting (also associated with PPD). And that's without the unrealistic pressure we put on women to "bounce back." We are allowed to care how we look.

Worrying about this does not make OP unfit to parent, it makes her honest with herself about whether she's ready to be a parent. [/quote]

Can't possibly disagree more.  If this is a big point of concern for OP, s/he is in no way ready to be a parent.  S/he will not have total control over this outcome, or any other part of the outcome, for that matter.  There are already too many selfish, immature people out there sucking at parenting.  There is no shortage of children in the world.  Anyone who isn't all-in on being a parent should just abstain.  [/quote]

Yea, agree with this.  It’s totally insane to ask this question.

(1) these decisions really should be happening separately - and I say this as a vain person who got Botox and filler regularly before getting pregnant. Still colors hair while pregnant and wears make everyday.  But like…my god, even I can see that one question is MUCH BIGGER and more life changing than the other.  BTW, i plan to return to the botox, filler etc after done w/ breastfeeding (I can afford it).  I do plan to continue to care what i look like, but it’s just not that complicated. I can have both and if my looks suffer a little, so be it.  But as importantly  see #2.

(2) you’re going to age and get ugly.  Sorry but it’s just true.  That’s gonna happen regardless of whether you have kids.  You really need to start coming to terms w that and just enjoy the different stages of life.  I am having my first kid at 38.  I was pretty hot for many decades.  I’m 100% ready to accept whatever i look like after this.  Even after spending thousands on my looks, there is more to life than just that!  Particularly as I get older.[/quote]

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