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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't care how you were raised, I can't imagine gobbling up all of dinner knowing that my teen is going to be hungry when he gets home. [/quote]

I'm with you, OP.  MIL had more kids than she could handle, and some truly (truly) suffered for it.  MIL was checked out, and not into raising her kids, as much as she was about checking the boxes. It is sad to see the ramifications, but MIL also grew up that way, and sees no problem with it. She will never change. DH suffered because he acts the way you described. Not having enough food, but claiming that you do, is a big deal for MIL.  In other words, she wanted people to think she was/is competent, at her only job, but she just was not - she was greatly overwhelmed, and it showed.

I mention this in light of your question, and also because MIl knew enough to play favorites, which is hurtful and malicious. 
 Any time SIL and SIL's family was late for anything, MIL knew to save food for them.  Anyone else was on their own. 
MIL tended to make it about me, because she knew she was wrong. When you do not save food on a major holiday, for some immediate family members, but you do for others - that is really, really, really messed up. MIL is messed up in the head, and it came to light with new females added to the family, over the years.

Turns out, MIL and SIL are codependent.  SIL was also codependent on other SIL, but other SIL (thankfully) put a stop to it, fairly recently.

All this to say, I am not sure what to tell you, but if you are able to nip this primitve behavior in the bud, good on you - because it is very real and very destructive. No immediate family members should be treated in such a cold, caluclating, and selfish manner - least of all, growing children. [/quote]

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