Reply to When to tell kids the truth about their father’s adultery as reason for divorce

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]One parent loves the kids more than themselves.  It’s not the one that cheated.

That parent will carry the emotional burden and the fallout from it so that they can protect their sons from repeating the pattern of their father and future generations.  The emotional damage from learning your parent was a cheater has generational and huge emotional consequences.

I will protect my kids with my life and, unfortunately, that included biting my tongue about his affair.

Unfortunately, that time I was checked out and emotionally wrought from the news and he got to appear like the devoted, fun one.[/quote]

They will find out on their own some day, and the impact of that will be worse. [/quote]

I am not that PP. My mom kept my dad's cheating a secret. I found out about it from relatives when I was an adult. I have no problem at all with her decision. She had been badly hurt and was trying to protect us from additional hurt.

That our dad was not a good person became abundantly obvious to us even without mom telling us he was a cheater. A man can't hide his character from his kids by acting like "the fun parent". Not forever, anyway. And my dad didn't even try very hard - he very quickly moved on to his next family that he had with his AP.[/quote]

This is why I didn’t tell anyone.  Not family or friends.  My family is incredibly close and I know it would have gotten out at some point.[/quote]

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