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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I will give the OP a brief benefit of the doubt by asking a follow up: OP what do you mean by “dressed up”. Do you mean a dress and heels or do you mean jeans and a cute sweater?

Your wife not wanting to perform for you (and a dress and heels for no particular reason is a performance, especially since they typically come with shaved or waxed legs and makeup and done hair) should absolutely not be something that “pisses you off”. That’s a drastic overreaction. If your frustration is over being limited in restaurant venues to places that consider sweats acceptable, you have my sympathy.[/quote]

I'm the OP. I am not exactly sure what "performing" means. But if it means looking sexually enticing in public, I do not care about that. Nor do I care about heels or makeup. I have always thought makeup is kind of weird. But there comes a point where she has been wearing sweatpants every day for more than two years gets frustrating.[b] I feel like its sort of a symbol of giving up on ever trying to look good for your partner.[/b] And it also has the unwanted side-effect of limiting date venues.[/quote]

This is the heart of your issue. It’s what makes you “pissed off” — to you, this means she doesn’t care about YOU, that she doesn’t care enough to please you. I think you need to let go of that a little bit. Taking something that someone else does personally is never the path to happiness. Take care of yourself, dress well, and maybe she’ll catch on. But ultimately what she wears is up to her.

Maybe you can just tell her you really want to go to X and Y restaurants for date night and let her work it out. Seems fair that you would both get to pick restaurants. Obviously she can wear whatever she wants so long as it’s appropriate. If it’s a matter of comfort, there are other options out there… personally I love comfortable clothes, but to me that could be silk pants, cashmere dress, etc.[/quote]

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