Reply to Explain this weird MIL behavior

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think it’s a personal identity thing and a desire to still feel useful and like she can help with something. I believe you said, upthread, she doesn’t have much else going on. I think she makes a big deal out of doing this once a week and she sees it as something she can contribute to the world and her family. It can be really hard to grow older and feel like you’ve lost your identity and can no longer care for the people you love. Of course it’s annoying to have to deal with someone so desperate to “help” but, honestly, I’d lean in to it. I’d keep going and compliment her cooking throughout the dinner and just keep saying “no thanks, I’m so full, this was an amazing meal!”. I know some people would disagree with this but I see it as an act of grace and as a small self sacrifice that has a major positive impact on your MIL. Going and showing appreciation is an act of kindness.

My grandmother was a busy career woman with about a million interests up unit the day she died. She always joked she was a terrible cook [/quote]

Sorry, I submitted this early! Anyway, grandma never cooked but she loved to have long philosophical discussions and talk about world events. As she got older, she would repeat the same things and lose her points often but my mom and dad would spend time with her talking for hours, anyway. I think it was tiring for them and probably a little boring but they did it out of love for her. I admire them for being willing to put aside their preferences so she could hang onto her sense of self and dignity. [/quote]

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