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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]  I just ignore and keep doing my thing, but it is incredibly annoying and of course it sucks feeling unattractive to my spouse while being really in shape at the same time.[/quote]

I’m amazed that you haven’t shamed him into getting into shape. It’s sad and embarrassing when a wife is in better shape than her husband - though I see it all the time. You shouldn’t worry about being unattractive to him… I think he is worried about being unattractive to you, but instead of making himself more attractive he is trying to drag you down to his level. What a loser![/quote]

He is not out of shape, though he is the cardio bunny and I am the lifter in my household. But he often complains about the lack of muscle on him and I think there is some element of truth on what you said about him worrying about him becoming unattractive to me, because I think he convinced himself is that all I care about is muscle. I also dont think he would ever join me at the gym because  [b]he would be worried about  all the huge guys he imagines there and about me outlifting him[/b].[/quote]

First of all, I'm a guy, and I don't think I've ever been at a gym where there weren't other guys who could outlift me. If you are strongest man in the gym, you probably need to go to a new gym instead of Planet Fitness or some other "woman friendly" place. Heck, at my current gym, pretty much [i]all[/i] the guys can outlift me. I find this inspirational not intimidating. They are stronger because they are mostly in their 20s and I am in my 40s. I'm certainly not ever going to be the strongest guy in my gym. But I don't care. The only guy I am competing with is me, the last time I was at the gym. I want to be stronger than previous me! That's why I keep a fitness log, so I do more every time. If your DH can't get over being outlifted, that's pretty sad. Lose the ego, dude.

There are also some women at my current gym who can outlift me. I'm not weak, either. But they are 25 and are training for powerlifting meets, and I'm not young or a competitor. Again, I don't care. I say, good for them, I hope they keep it up as they get older. If you can outlift your DH, that should only be a temporary embarrassment. With consistent effort, he would quickly become stronger than you. The only thing standing in his way is his ego. He could just go at a different time from you for a while, until he got stronger than you, if that's his problem.

I can't even understand the mentality of a man who would allow himself to be weaker than his wife.[/quote]

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