Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
»
Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Why can't men [my DH] multitask????"
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] +1. I’m not changing the baby’s diaper and packing up lunch at the same time. But I can quickly run down the list of things I need to accomplish and get to work. [b]I think DH gets more easily overwhelmed by household tasks. Not sure why this is.[/b] [/quote] because he doesn't want to do it and knows you will pick up his slack.[/quote] Why is everyone so unwilling to accept the (by far) simplest answer??[/quote] because then they would have to confront it, and that would cause issues. Throwing the "disorder" label means that they can excuse it and avoid the confrontation. To be fair, this is not a hill to die on and trying to change the paradigm would be like moving a mountain. I can see why women would choose to excuse/ignore it. It's just easier.[/quote] It really is easier because even if you convinced him that it was a problem AND that he needed to change, he won't magically get good at this stuff overnight. It's a skill and you have to refine it. I'm just really good at managing the household and a lot of it I don't even find difficult anymore. I even take pleasure in it when it's not burning me out. So I think a lot of women choose to just ride it out through the early childhood years and hope for a break later. If you only have one or two kids and downshift to a less demanding job, especially one with shorter hours, then by the time your kids are 7 or 8, you might actually have a pretty nice lifestyle. Still doing more on the home/kid front, but with a less demanding job and more free time overall. Plus there are advantages to being the one who runs things -- you wind up getting to make a lot of the decisions. That gets addictive after a while. I never force anything on my DH that would make him miserable (that wouldn't serve my interests either) but I am the deciding vote in what vacations we take, how we fix up the house, what cars we buy, the food we eat, etc. If it had been possible to have a more equal partner, I would have picked that. But it wasn't, and my consolation prize is that I have a lot more power over our day to day life than I would if we shared more of these responsibilities in a more equal way. [/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics