Reply to Here's the thing I don't understand about husbands who don't help out

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]NP. Ok for all the women defending this bad behavior from men. What would you say to the attorney OP was referencing? She’s the only one working, with 2 kids at home, no help and an unemployed husband. If he refused to take the two kids to the grocery store because he “can’t” juggle them and the task of selecting groceries, what would you say?

Ok honey? [/quote]

If you read that thread, her husband has a chronic health condition for which he requires regular medical appointments; to my reading, he also sounds depressed.  Many of us commenting on that thread are being practical: she needs to hire help, first, so she can not feel like she's drowning, and then, second, work on getting her husband the help he needs.  It's not (just) that he's lazy, there's more to it.

There may well be bigger issues that poster needs to address with her husband, but that can't be done while they're both utterly drained.  Working on relationships takes energy, which few people have in abundance right now, especially when they're overfunctioning (the wife) or sick and depressed (the husband).[/quote]

Sure but he should still be able to take his 2 kids to the grocery store. What would he do if they divorced and split custody and he no longer had her to lean on so heavily? Oh right, he’d figure it out like the adult that he is.[/quote]

If he can’t do this, he shouldn’t have had 2 kids. Really his problem is just that he’s inexperienced and therefore uncomfortable with it, not that he literally can’t do it. He just needs practice, which he is too lazy to do.

Mothers never get to use inexperience as an excuse. It’s bullshit.[/quote]

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