Reply to Do I have a right to be upset with my 25 year old DD?

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[quote=Anonymous]Barring any extenuating factors (grandmother is awful or something else is going on in the family; boss was going to be at the work party and face time was important), I would be upset if my child blew off their grandparent's birthday simply to hang out with friends after work AND I would let my child know that I am disappointed in their decision and that I hope they make a different decision the next time. I would also let my child know that it would be nice if they could find some time in the near future to spend with their grandmother since they missed celebrating her birthday. It doesn't have to be confrontational or passive-aggressive. And it doesn't have to get drawn out.  I wouldn't go on and on about it if my child disagreed with me or pushed back.

You don't stop being a parent simply because your child is 25.  You can't control what they do but you can absolutely continue to guide them if you see them making decisions that are immature, selfish or harmful to themselves or others.  It's a fine line between this and sticking your nose in their business when you shouldn't, but I think as a parent you have to err on the side of being a little annoying when it comes to things that are important to you.  And I would hope that my relationship with my adult child is such that we can have conversations like this without it becoming an issue.  [/quote]

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