Reply to paying for "extras" on top of child support

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[quote=Anonymous]Another evil stepmom here.
Yes, I knew DH had kids when we got married. I didn't know until we were engaged that his ex got 65% of his income. 65%. Wow. I didn't even think that was legal. She lied about how much she made. I found out through public records (she's a state employee) years after the divorce that all state employees received a raise the month of the hearing. She used an old pay stub and when asked if it was accurate she said yes (I have the transcripts). She purposely took a low paying job to make it seem like she had no ability to make money. So, she only made $38k (with a BS in Computer Science), but low and behold, when child support was re-addressed 3 years later (oldest had turned 18), she was making $75k. Wow. That's pretty transparent that she was trying to suck money out of her ex.
But to the point... for an 8 year old child of a teacher, before and after school care should be below $300/month. Groceries, more like $200/month. Clothes? Not like he's outgrowing them every month, so $100/month. Additional housing cost? $500. So, less than $1000, split between 2 people (the father and mother) is $500/month each. $1400 is generous. Paying 100% of extra curricular activities is more than generous. 
Camp is glorified daycare. If you don't need it (ie - aren't working) there is no need for camp. Particulalry since he's already getting 4 weeks of it through his time with his father.
Our court order (and yes, I'll call it ours since it affects OUR finances) has my DH paying $2800 in alimony (never mind she makes almost as much as him), $800/month in child support, he provides medical and dental insurance, they split 50/50 the co-pays. Any extra curricular activities are up to her to pay. He's paid for more than half of college for the older child, and gives the younger one a monthly allowance.
Frankly, its f-ed up. She's told the kids he pays very little in child support. Which is true. But what hasn't been disclosed to the kids is the HUGE amount she gets in alimony. If there was any fairness to it, there would be no alimony and the child support should be higher.
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