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Reply to "Son wants to start working after undergraduate "
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[quote=Anonymous]OP Here. I want to thank all people who have responded with thoughtful anecdotes, experiences or suggestions. I kept quiet since yesterday because I was not sure how to respond to some hurtful or snide remarks. But I will respond to a few today to dispel the lie that I am a troll. I am not a troll. I am a parent with concerns about my son's decision to start working right away, especially because he is not very driven in his career aspirations like his close friends. I respect his decisions for his life and that is why I did not object to his choice of undergraduate major (irrespective of my apprehension). I will not do anything to force him to chose his path. In fact, I am helping him with his resume, cover letter and job search at this time. That does not mean I can ignore my fear. My fear brought me here to post so that I can hear other people's perspective and adjust my thinking. Many responses here has helped me to see the situation differently. I realize that it is probably best to let him figure out his career in stead of going through a Masters degree too, aimlessly. He is a very conscientious, strong willed and smart young man. So, he would eventually figure his path out. When he does, I will be there to help, if he needs. I also liked the idea to not help (or bail) him financially while he is establishing himself. I did not disclose my $300K+ salary to brag. I mentioned that to contrast it with what my son wants to earn and settle for. Our salary is not extraordinary, I know. But with the salary + perks + savings we are doing more than fine. We did not chose management path (someone asked here) because of the extra hours it would have required from both of us while our kids were growing. We earn enough to live a good life, can pay for children's full education, can help our own siblings and parents financially, and retire comfortably. We are not meddling in our children's life. In our culture we take care of our children even when they are way past 18, we take care of our adult (and sometime married) siblings if they need help and we take care of our parents in our home when they are old. While we do all these, we debate with one another about life's choices. We do not prevent our children from making their own decision, but we also do not stay detached as if they are strangers. That's not called meddling, it shows that we care; at least that is what I think. [/quote]
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