Reply to What time should a college student be in the library by on a Sunday?

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[quote=Anonymous]Come on OP!  This is crazytown.  You sound insane trying to stalk your own kid and micromanage her college life.  If you are paying tuition, then you can tell your kid you expect them to maintain a certain a certain GPA.  Then back off and let them do it.

And delete your stalker apps. Sitting around and checking every 5 minutes:  is she studying now?  What about now?  How about now? And getting increasingly worked up is bad for you and her.  What are you doing to do when you discover she spent the night in some guys room?

Plus, you have no idea. I usually studied in my dorm room and was phi beta kappa.   I also had an overbearing narcissistic mom and learned how to draw boundaries in college.  I would absolutely have left my phone in my room when I went to study, or given it to a guy I knew to take to his room for the night, then have him throw it in his backpack while he wandered around town and went to a movie with friends.   And when my mom called upset about studying after stewing all day, would have been like, “what are you talking about?  I was in the library for 10 hours today. Oh, my phone?  I left it at dinner last night.  I need to grab it from Larlo in a couple hours.”  Or, I would leave it with a friend in the library and take off for the day.

If I were your DD, I would also turn off the trackers on my phone.  My SIL has overbearing parents who made her respond to a pager in College.  First she “lost” the pager. When she got a new one it kept “running out of battteries” and “getting left in the dorm room,” so my ILs would call us hysterical when they pager and she didn’t respond (DH and a I lived closer to the campus, but still two hours away).  My mother is currrently blocked from seeing most of my FB activity. And I’m 45. But she has nothing better to do than dissect what am have liked and loved, etc and critisize.  Don’t be my mother OP.  You want a better relationship with your kid. [/quote]

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