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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]NP here-I'll start off by saying that I understand why the OP has a sense of loss/disappointment. I am a few years shy of 50 and none of my friends are near the grandparent phase of life yet but I hear a lot of talk from women I work with about how wonderful having grandchildren is, how it's the best gift their child could ever give them, etc. I'm sure (amongst other things) that listening to that sort of talk and feeling as though it's not something you'll ever have would be really tough. I think it's great, though, that the OP isn't pressuring her children and understands that it's their choice to make.

Just thought I'd share my experience/perspective FWIW. I am childless by circumstance. My sister has kids and I feel to some degree like a failure for not being able to produce grandchildren for my mother. It's been tough. It's like not only did I fail to be like most women and have a child but I also personally let down my mother. But then I think about things and I get mad. Would I feel this way as a man? Probably not. I hate that society and unfortunately many women (hardly ever men, in my experience) place such a huge, huge importance on being a mother or grandmother. I know that they are phenomenal, life changing and for most people very rewarding experiences but it's not the only thing in life. I am happy in spite of not being able to have kids. I really resent it when I hear about how people who don't have kids are "missing out" in life. Yeah, I'm missing out on that experience but please don't imply that my life is somehow inferior and that I'm to be pitied.  Also, I'm a full blown adult with adult responsibilities-I haven't received any financial support from my parents since I was a college kid. The implication that people without children are irresponsible and aren't really grown up or adult is definitely not the case in most situations.

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I'm childfree so I can't really relate to you but I am so glad that you are aware of the misogyny imposed on women who don't have children. So many men out there don't have children even in middle age and guess what? They are proud of it. Bill Maher, Leonardo Di, Jay Leno...they don't get questioned about children, why should women??? [/quote]

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