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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Wow, thank you everybody.  What a wide range of responses. I appreciate them, especially the positive ones. I've been thinking about the statement that I'm not good with money. Originally, I took that to mean that I was spending too much or being irresponsible.  But now, after reading about different sort of accounts, tax issues, etc, I see that I have a lot to learn. I know enough to [b]have a finanancial advisor to manage my retirement options and accounts[/b] that I started long ago for college. Thats the extent of my financial knowledge. I put my trust in the professional.

I don't blow money on purses and shoes as someone said. [b]I don't spend frivolously[/b]--although no judgement on those who love nice accessories, etc.  I think that we could use what we bring home to pay off the $5k.  That isn't something that's accumulating.  I meant on average we will havevabout $5k on our 
cards.

I don't think my dh is thinking of leaving. There's no evidence of that, at least. I think this has been a hobby of his and it's an account he has slowly built up over the years. I don't feel he is trying to pull the wool over my eyes, but I think he was being selfish and he wanted to keep it to himself. He's not one to buy expensive things.  He just likes to see the account grow.

I know "selfish" is a strong way to describe someone so I don't use that lightly. While my kids were little, I was a SAHM for a couple years. We didn't have as much income bc I wasn't earning a paycheck. During this time, we had more debt.  We bought a house at the height of the real estate bubble, etc. so we had higher bills (we have since refinanced).  Anyway, my grandmother passed and left me an inheritance of about $30K.  Instead of keeping that for just myself, I paid off our debt. It didn't occur to me to not spend it on us. Maybe that was fiscally unwise, but it didn't feel right to have that and not share with him.

Anyway, thank you again for weighing in. You've given me a lot to think about. 
[/quote]

These two statements are inconsistent with each other.  Having actively managed accounts is a frivolous expense.  Take a few hours or a day and read the Bogleheads wiki and manage these yourself.  You are literally throwing away thousands of dollars on fees with actively managed funds.[/quote]
So, everyone who uses a financial advisor is using money frivolously?? That makes no sense.[/quote]

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