Reply to Is this ridiculous? DH and I disagree over whether to have another child

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Reply to "Is this ridiculous? DH and I disagree over whether to have another child"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I was 1 of 4 and wish my parents didn't have this many. Fun and cute when little - but now all 4 of us are dealing with life problems and it is stressing out my parents because they want to help, and can't because they can only help 1, not 4.

And to the person who thinks it is a gift to have a big family - speak for yourself, it an be very painful, too.[/quote]

Anecdotally it can go either way.

I'm an only child and wish that I had siblings especially as an adult. It sounds like you had a fun childhood with your siblings, I was very lonely growing up, especially since we moved frequently so I don't even have an attachment to a hometown. Now that I'm an adult, I also have the added pressure of being the only one who will deal with my parents' health care and end of life decisions. My DH has siblings and it's a completely different dynamic with his side of the family. His brothers are there for support in difficult times and it makes a world of difference. With my parents, everything is on me. No help. No support. Just me. Alone. It sucks. [/quote]

Different PP than you are responding to.

Your anecdotal point doesn't address OP's issue.  This would apply if OP were trying to have a second child to go with one child.  But OP is talkinig about having a 4th child.  Her children already have siblings, and no longer have to deal with the issues of loneliness from being an only child or the concern that they will be the only one dealing with aging parents (although there are many families with multiple siblings where only one sibling has to deal with elder care issues).

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