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[quote=Anonymous]I think the Frickers did they best they could in an impossible situation. While at first I was taken aback by  discussion of what they could have done differently, I now see the value of looking at this in retrospect and wondering how we could handle this if we are ever in a situation with a lunatic.

One issue besides the fact we now know he has mental illness is level of cognitive functioning. If it was low, it might make him more vulnerable to brainwashing. Plus, we don't how much anti-Semitism etc he was exposed to in his family and community. Maybe hate was taught at an early age. We also don't know if he has ever been abused, etc.

Thinking about mental health and cognitive abilities I might not label him crazy Nazi right away, but instead indicate he is showing scary red flags and I am concerned. I would insist my child breakup, but in addressing the parents of the boy I might tread lightly since we don't know their level of mental health. Share concerns, insist them must not continue dating and also say we are alerting them both to get their support in keeping him from visiting, but also because we wanted them to know because we know teens can take breakups very hard. I would also say I found these sites and think they are his, but unless I had proof I would not insist he is a neonazi.

I would contact the school and share facts and suspicions calmly, but also ask for a game plan as to how to keep him away from my daughter. I would also explore with them other options for school for my child and there may be none. Perhaps consider homeschooling for a few months as they adjust to the breakup. Are there other schools with as small a student teacher ratio as Dominion?

This whole approach may not have prevented this. It is MUCH easier to reason through AFTER you know he was indeed a psycho killer, but maybe we can benefit from figuring out other strategies because guns are easy to get and who knows if we might one day deal with a mentally ill teen with a gun.[/quote]

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