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[quote=Anonymous]OP,

I totally relate to your question as one who also grew up needing to do a cost/benefit for everything.  The great part is that your DC is hardworking and has taken full advantage of the education to date.  Given those character traits, the likelihood is he/she has the basics in place to do well anywhere. Good problem to have but it's not easy when so much choice is available either.

I would focus in on the fit.  Not so much by major as they change their minds when college broadens their horizons (although for STEM it's helpful if there is wriggle room).
Your DC has spent most of her education years in relatively small classes.  One of the questions to ask yourself is if in classroom engagement with faculty and like-minded peers is very important to his/her satisfaction with the educational experience.  For some kids that is a deal breaker, others not so much as outside of the classroom experiences via ECs is where their development will predominately thrive   The advisory system is important.  And...the track record with graduate school placement.  It is not a given that private colleges are superior in both respects for all kids so you'll want to look closely at WHICH privates and WHICH state schools to assess the relative advantage.   My personal opinion is there are huge differences between the Ivies and Ivy-likes.  I agree with the previous poster that the best education available is the biggest gift you can provide your DC.  Whether a private school expense is worth it "depends".

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