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[quote=Anonymous]How old is the kid?

Your problem is really common, OP.  Seriously.  Bring it up with the guys next time you are out for a beer.  Especially men with young kids at home.

Women are touched out.  Sex dries up.  Men need sex to feel connected.  Disconnect comes.  Women need connection for sex.  Less sex ensues.  Downward spiral.

I have a happy ending for you - DW and I made it through the infant, toddler and ES years.  Oldest is about to start middle school.  We are connected again, we have a decent sex life.  Everything is looking up.

I don't have a happy middle for you.  We fought about sex.  A lot.  I was miserable.  She cried.  I had an affair.  Two of them.  She never found out about either affair.  Most of my friends who were dad's of young kids had affairs too.  One was caught, there are still together.

I wish I could give you advice but the truth is that all you can control is what you control.  Keep planning date nights, keep in good shape, keep being attentive.  Keep the conversation about sex on the front burner, even if it leads to tears.  Accept quickies and boring sex, even when it stings your ego.  Don't pout about the lack of sex.  Go be the best version of you.  And if (when) you have an affair, don't get caught.  When the kids get older, hopefully your marriage will be strong and intact.  Divorce is hell on kids.  Stay married, stay sane.[/quote]

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