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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I'm hoping for your sake that you're just immature. That can be fixed with time and perspective. You come off as a whiner complaining about "helping with the baby" when taking care of your family is exactly what you do as an adult. I think you need to do two things. First, own up to the fact that you wanted something to happen with the ex. You may not now, but at that time you most certainly did. Second, find a way to draw inspiration from whatever sources you need to. I personally draw my inspiration from the command module pilots of the Apollo era. My mom seems to draw hers from lighthouse keepers. I don't think you need to do grand gestures. You do need to be thinking of things to do with your wife and then actually do those things. You need to be open to her ideas and she needs to be open to yours. I don't think it's realistic to expect one partner to do all the planning and implementation, and yes, it took me years to get to that realization. You both need to make sure that you live where you want to live and have access to resources and activities that make your lives as a couple and a family enjoyable. Only you and your wife can figure that out, and in some respects they will both be different. My husband doesn't give a rat's ass about the neighborhood pool. My kids and I love it. I'm sure there are things he cares about that I don't. So long as you can appreciate that these things matter to the other person that's all you need to do. [/quote]

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