Reply to Your experience with sexual abuse...and if you ever told.

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[quote=Anonymous]Multiple rapes by my first boyfriend when I was 16-17. I would say no and he would proceed. He was physically and emotionally abusive, and I was afraid he would hurt me if I tried to resist more than saying no. When I tried to break up with him, he came to my home and threatened himself (and me) with a large kitchen knife, while my parents were in the home sleeping. When I successfully broke up with him, finally, he stalked me for several years. At least once a week I would look in my rearview mirror while driving and see him behind me. Whenever I would arrive at my home, he would call and hang up as soon as someone answered, I think just to show me for years how closely he was watching. It was horrible and creepy and I feared for my life for a long time. Eventually his attentions were directed to another poor woman, and a few years later he died of an overdose. It was the first time since I was 16 that I felt safe, when I learned he had passed away.

I never told my parents but they knew  he was controlling. I later learned that my father had purchased a gun while we were dating, just to protect the family from the psycho if needed, and that my parents consulted a lawyer about a restraining order when I broke up with him (which was ultimately decided against). My parents would have been supportive of me. I was just very ashamed of the situation I was in. Was the "perfect good girl" type and totally blamed myself for being in the situation. I also stopped taking communion at church during those years, which I think conveyed some things to my parents as well. [/quote]

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