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Reply to "Can any DILs/MILs/SILs cop to bad behavior?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote]Historically, I think [b]the central theme of my conflicts with my MIL has related to our respective roles. I think she sees herself as the matriarch[/b], whereas I see her as DH's mother. Her matriarchal tendencies extend to my house, where she (e.g.) tells me to use paper plates because china is too much work and helps herself (announcing, not asking) to leftovers to take home after we host a dinner. Minor conflicts in the grand scheme of things but [b]reflective of our different understandings of who we are in the family dynamic[/b].[/quote] I think this is an important post. I, like most DILs, have had to bow to a matriarch but I am trying to have a different relationship with my adult children. As long as they are adults, defined as financially dependent, I'm trying to view us as equals. The problem on the horizon is when my own mother dies, I worry that without a bossy-one to organize us, that my siblings and I will drift apart.[/quote]
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