Reply to How do you deal with a situation that is affecting you but its really none of your business?

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Reply to "How do you deal with a situation that is affecting you but its really none of your business?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I had a similar situation growing up with some wild cousins who were underparented and disrupted nearly every family gathering. When their mother died and their shitty dad remarried a much younger woman and had another kid it got even worse. It is tough, and the only way in yo uhave is through the family member, your BIL in this case. For us, that person was the problem, so we had no real lever. Maybe your DH will have insight in how to support his brother in better parenting his kids. It sounds like SIL's laxity is the root of these kids' problem.

I think your way forward is right there in your subject line. You deal with the situation by sticking to the aspects that affect you, because they are your business. their obesity: no. their shrieking: yes. You set house rules and consequences for violating them, and stick to it. It sounds like your dad has the right outlook here: if they don't want to participate, they won't be included.

One of my cousins was a little different and a bit more willing to interact with us so we encouraged that as much as we could (while his brothers ran around wildly).  That's another tack you can think about how to explore, how to inventivize good behavior in these kids given the limited tools you have at hand.    [/quote]

Thank you for the insight. It is nice to not feel alone.

I think we are all just going to have to interact with these children on their terms until we can get them to warm up to trying something new. I have never met a child that is so unwilling to try something exciting and new. But I'll keep on trying.[/quote]

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