Reply to Do I have an obligation to tell my sister what her DH said?

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Reply to "Do I have an obligation to tell my sister what her DH said?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's entirely possible that this guy is charming in public but an ass in private with her. I once dated a guy who would, say, fight with me in the car on the way to a party to the extent I'd be close to tears, and then go into the party in a great mood. Meanwhile I'd be on edge and looked like the depressed screwed up one bc I couldn't just shrug off his hostility, which no one else saw.[/quote]

Right. Blame the victim. Men don't get emotionally abused. Everyone knows that.[/quote]

NP here.  Seriously, we have no basis for concluding that the guy is being abused, even if the wife does speak negatively about him to her family.  Not every unkind act toward a spouse is abuse.  The conversation he had with OP makes me think he has his share of issues and may well treat his wife poorly and with lot of rage.  I just don't see a guy who isn't somewhat unhinged speaking about his wife that way to her sister.

Bottom line is we don't really know what goes on in someone else's marriage.  [b]If OP's sister is truly a great sister, friend, daughter, etc., my guess is that her attitude toward her spouse is being triggered by something[/b].  Not saying she's totally blameless, but OP should not be so quick to conclude that the sister deserves whatever is coming to her.  [/quote]

The relationship with a spouse is MUCH different than a birth family.[/quote]

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