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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Everybody knows that the proper time is a good 15min late and up to 30. 10 min early? No way![/quote]

I detest when people show up late. It makes me think they forgot or don't care that I have a dish roasting and scheduled to come out roughly 45 minutes after they arrive. By showing up 30 minutes late, you throw off my whole party plans as now I'm trying to shove a cocktail and appetizers down your throat in 15 minutes and then hurrying you to the table.

Arrive late like that consistently and you will be unlikely to be invited again unless you are family, in which case the rest of us have talked about your poor manners for years and now tell you to be places an hour before we actually want you there because that means you might show up somewhere near the actual time of the event.[/quote]

Okay, so speaking of : my in-laws are ALWAYS early. I suspect they think they are "helping" but like others it's really just an extra task for me to think of some busy work that will keep them out of the way (I consider this more work). They don't expect to be entertained, but - esp. my mother in law- does things really differently than I do and she can be unwittingly domineering about it... I cant think of an example now but stuff that I have to either will fully ignore and decide my friends will love me even if i am tacky OR subtly try to fix when she isn't looking. any suggestions? this has been going on for years but it's not as bad as it used to be. if i didn't care how they felt i'd say, "seriously, it totally stressed me out when you arive so early and it's not helpful. please dont' think you are being helpful" but clearlyi can't say that.

maybe, "hey, next time feel free to come at the appointed hour! we love being the ones to put the finishing touches on our prep but feel so bad not being able to entertain you well in the last minutes leading up to our guests arrival!"[/quote]

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