Reply to Popcorn Problem: how could this have been handled better?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Seasoned wife and mother here.

Young mothers tend to be control freaks - not a bad thing per se, but attending to the needs of a young brood tends to bring that out in some people.

The advice that I will give a lot of you probably will not register for a few years, but here goes.  If you want to have a good relationship with your DH and just a peaceful marriage, a lot of you need to learn to delegate properly.  My marriage is not perfect but this is a skill that I learned after a few years.  DH is pretty active with household stuff anyways, but if I ask him (not tell) him to do something, I do not tell him HOW to get the task done and if the task is done within reason, I do not critique it. Now if he really screws it up (which is rare) I mention it to him, but not in a negative confrontational posture.  One example is that my DH uses the dishwasher and I prefer to hand-wash.  Thus, I know that if I need him to cover the dishes, he is going to do it his way.  And if I want it done MY way, I should be prepared to do it myself.  I am just not sure it is constructive for a person or a marriage to micromanage to that degree.

Many of you are in the "pre-martyr" stage where you insist your DH is an idiot and that is why you have to do everything.  [/quote]

So what is your take on the popcorn clean-up at issue?[/quote]

PP here.  Honestly, is is understood in our house that if we decide to do chores like this a certain way, no one will question it.  I do not automatically someone as lazy or imcompetent because they do things differently.  And my DH is not either of those.  But it is also understood that you deal with the consequences of your decisions.  Thus, if the popcorn does attract critters or whatever, DH would be responsible for taking care of it.  As long as that is understood, I am not going to lose much sleep over his decision.

Also, because someone else brought it up, the "choking" aspect of it is a red herring to me.  If the DW thought it was ok for the kids to play with popcorn, it is a stretch to say it is a choking hazard now.

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