Reply to Back me up on being the mean, mean mommy

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I was a sentimental keep everything kid. For various reasons my things were vary important to me. My mom used to go through my things and throw them out and it caused a serious rift in our relationship. It showed me...

....that she didn't care about what was important to me
....that she didn't know me very well to think that it would be okay to throw my stuff out (just because she wouldn't care about those things, then she assumed I wouldn't care about them either).
...that nothing of mine was really mine - that she felt she could do with it as she wanted
...that she had no respect for me (finding things you care about in the trash and knowing they were taken from your space and put there intentionally feels disrespectful).

In the end all her actions did was make me feel even more like keeping stuff, I just got better at hiding it in places she couldn't find. She still found things and threw them out assuming they were of no value since she didn't value them. It was the main reason I really stopped trusting her and no longer confided anything in her as I got into my teen years. I still went on to be a controlled hoarder, and still am, and her throwing out my stuff made it worse.

She gets mad because every time she comes to my house I tell her that she is not to throw a single thing out without my permission. This is no longer her space to do as she pleases and I will not let her continue to disrespect me that way now that I can have a voice. I don't allow her in the bedrooms or anywhere I have my 'stuff'. I don't trust her judgment of what has value to me.

[/quote

Sounds as if you have bigger control issues. [/quote]

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