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Reply to "S/O: ‘The DIL is in the busiest chapter of her life; you have nothing to do’"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Only on DCUM can a grandmother compliment her DIL and be called insincere.[/quote] I don't think this is a DCUM thing, I think it's people who were raised in families where people didn't speak this way. I grew up in the 80s and 90s in a family where people rarely gave earnest compliments and sarcasm was used by all members (including my parents) as a defense mechanism and to shame and establish hierarchies. I've since gotten therapy and healed from that and a lot of other dysfunction in my childhood, and now I can accept a compliment on, for instance, my parenting. BUT I still couldn't accept this from my mom, because decades of sarcasm and meanness would make me assume it was not sincere. I have a different dynamic with my DH and kids now and I feel confident that I could tell my DD or a DIL that they are a wonderful mother and that I support them without it coming off as insincere.[/quote]
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