Reply to How would you react if your college DD scolded you publicly because you asked her to hang out one night?

Forum Index » College and University Discussion

Reply to "How would you react if your college DD scolded you publicly because you asked her to hang out one night?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]OP, I think some of the PP's are being unnecessarily harsh (or are bots or trolls that pop up in every thread to advocate for extreme measures). Instead of focusing on the negative, why not focus on the positive? You asked your daughter to spend Friday night/Saturday morning with you and a relative, and she agreed to it. Sure, maybe she snarked about it after you snarked about something else, but she didn't say no. Take that as a win.

College is a time to begin asserting independence and that's what you're daughter is doing. She's going to her boyfriend's for Thanksgiving -- that's not a rejection of you, but  testing her wings out. Maybe she'll go somewhere with the boyfriend's family over Winter Break -- again, testing her wings. The worst thing you can do is make her feel like your love is transactional by withdrawing emotionally or financially because she's trying out "adulting." If you are kind and supportive, as she gets older and feels less of a need to separate, she'll come back to you and the warmth of home and family. If you choose to make her feel guilty or shamed, you could create a rift.

Of course, maybe your daughter is self-centered and mean and will never be nice to you, but if that's the case, it won't change no matter what you do, so you might as well react with kindness and see where it takes you.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics