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[quote=Anonymous]Brenda accepted and took everything of value that was Joan’s and that would have given Joan (actually both of them) more autonomy and independence.  Now Joan has no assets.  If the house was given away in the last five years, it may even affect her ability to quality for Medicaid because Medicaid has a 5-year look back period.  Both were left more vulnerable by the decisions they made.

Brenda lacks gratitude for the huge sacrifices her mother made for her when she was in debt and in a pickle — her mother gave her own house away to help her!  Now that her mother is the one in need and vulnerable, Brenda can’t stand it.

Brenda’s complaining about Joan over the years is likely undermining her and keeping people away — no one wants to step up to help such an allegedly horrible person.  And because she’s always quick to complain, no one wants to take the chance that Brenda will shred their efforts when they don’t or can’t meet her standards, either.

Brenda is not powerless — she owns the house.  If she wants things to be different, she could sell the house.  But she should also do right by Joan and compensate her for a share of the house.  (They’ll probably need professional help to figure that out.)  Then they can go their separate ways.  
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