Reply to What do people mean when they say 2 kids is really hard?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OK, so for the people who say this is about your parenting philosophy, when does this become true? I am in the newborn stage right now with #2, and my usually awesome, well-behaved toddler is regressing a little-- peeing her pants, even pooping them twice, which made her sob for a long time out of shame and embarrassment, crying at the drop of a hat, pretending to be the baby. As for the baby, setting limits w/ a fussy 3-week-old? "No, it is not acceptable for you to be crying for every diaper change! Stop demanding nourishment, gosh darn it!"

I do think when it comes down to it, I am fortunate. My baby will nap in her pack and play/bouncer when she is not too refluxy or fussy, and my toddler will play independently for hours and obeys my requests. However, there is still: operating on 5 hours of total sleep, no more than 2 of them consecutive; a toddler who has stopped napping (we still do quiet time, but she just doesn't sleep) so she is cranky by late afternoon; having to time things perfectly with both kids to even get out of the house to play in the backyard; trying to console a screaming, unhappy newborn while I change a huge diaper blowout when the toddler trips and falls and is bleeding and screaming for me, too, and so I grab the baby because I can't leave her on the changing table and she poops and pees all over me while I am rushing to toddler...

Maybe I am just fabulously inept, but w/ a 3 week old and a 2 yr old, I would say it's not constantly hard-- I've finished 3 novels while breastfeeding/burping alone, so there is a form of downtime, and I'm on this site now!-- but there are definitely trying moments that would not exist with only one kid, or with two caregivers for two kids-- my weekends with husband are actually really fun and do-able. But in any case, I would really challenge the people who say 2 kids is easy to please try to remember the early days with #2; I think even with the easiest baby in the world, there is likely some challenge to trying to feed and clothe and change and bathe and nap/bedtime 2 (or more!) kids w/ different schedules, but both of whom are still dependent on you for basic needs, often at the same time. [/quote]

I don't think any of us who thought the transition from 1 to 2 wasn't so bad would deny that having a baby again was hard and presented challenges (sleep being a BIG one) and of course, you cannot set limits on a 3 week old.  But you can to a certain extent on a 2-3 year old.  The first years are hard, but hopefully that work makes the next years much much easier.  [/quote]

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