Reply to Thinking back as a mom, was Kate Gosselin really that bad?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here. This is interesting to me, to see many responses on the spooning?  I don’t think I could name one friend or relative who was not spanked or had a parent use something like a sandal or spoon. We even had other people’s grandparents disciplining us as kids. [/quote]

How old are you? My oldest is in his 40s and none of the other parents I knew were spanking their kids at that time. And using an object to hit your kids with was definitely thought of as outrageous. 
[/quote]

(DP). Im 44. I was spanked, my brothers got the belt when they were really bad.

I don’t spank my kids but I know two other moms who used a wooden spoon / spatula on their kids, 5-10 years ago. They freely talked about it, the one mom who used the spatula called it a “spatchie pop” lol. This was in the country, I think it’s still prevalent in rural areas.

Kate’s behavior didn’t seem that bad to me. I was raised by less than stellar parents though…[/quote]

Another DP, 43 - our mom hit us with a wooden spoon (which is actually to this day a running joke because it never hurt) and our dad beat the crap out of us with belts, sometimes the buckle end.  I knew when it was happening that our belt "spankings" were more abusive than what happened to other kids but there was plenty of cover for them because spankings were incredibly mainstream in general - if we said we got a whooping the reaction was "yeah because your parents care about you" not "OMG as a mandatory reporter I am outraged!"[/quote]

My oldest is a couple of years younger than you, so I was a parent to young children at the same time your parents were. Spanking was not considered mainstream during that time. I’m sorry you experienced what you did- that was not at all the norm at that time. I never spanked my children and none of the parents I knew did either. Yes, some may have given a quick swat on a diapered bottom every so often, but they felt really, really bad about that swat and talked about how guilty they felt about it with their mom friends.

Your parents sound like a throwback to the time when I was I child in the 60s and spanking was definitely more mainstream. By the 80s, it was looked down on by the general public. [/quote]

I'm here to tell you that we told people when we got whoopings (understood in the parlance to be "worse than a spanking" but not necessarily abusive) and the reaction ranged from "good for your parents" (from adults at school/church) to "I bet I get it worse/ did you have to pick your own switch?" from kids.  It was very much considered normal although there were likely some families that did not use any physical punishment.  I remember when they took corporal punishment out of schools and it was controversial.  A signficant contingent of parents were very much against it - when I was in elementary school you could still sign a paper saying you gave the principal permission to spank your kid.  This was in a wealthy suburb[b] in Texas [/b]in the late 80s/early 90s, not a holler in Appalachia in the 60s.[/quote]

Enough said. [/quote]

My husband is from Maryland and got spanked, same time frame.  It was so normal that he expected we would spank our kids (under 10 now), and was surprised by my refusal.  It's not the case that spanking were verboten in the 80s, although it's great that you didn't spank your kids. [/quote]

Op here. 40. Raised in DC. Spankings with belt and switch. Friend circle from PG County I referenced AA, Haitian/Dominican, Italian and Filipino and each has had an experience spanked by hand, spoon, sandal or belt. We’ve talked about this for years and related to each others experiences laughing about it years later.[/quote]

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