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[quote=Anonymous]What if you looked at this as a lesson in making the most of a less-than-ideal situation? It won’t be the last less-than-ideal situation she’ll be in. There will be more, likely many more, because this is life, and no matter how wonderful our kids are, and how much we adore them and try to make the world easy for them, life always contains enormous setbacks. Maybe this is an opportunity for you to help her look around and see not what ISN’T there, but rather what is. There are almost certainly incredible opportunities at her current school, but these can be harder to see when you always have one foot out the door. Encourage her to say, “okay, so this is reality, let’s start making the most of it.” This attitude will help her in life, not hurt her.

I suspect to really help her with this, you first might need to do some letting go. Let yourself feel the grief of what won’t be, but don’t wallow in it. Don’t dwell in anger or resentment— that will only model anger and resentment to her. Look for the good that’s there, and allow this truth to sink in: she doesn’t need to go to a top college to be worthy, bright, valued, and loved. She is already all these things. [/quote]

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