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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here for an update: all charges were dropped except one misdemeanor, which will also be dropped after one year of good behavior and some paid restitution. Whew.

Basically my kid (who had just turned 18, senior year) and friends snuck into an abandoned building to drink and smoke on the rooftop. When cops came everyone scattered but mine got caught. Charges included intent to burglarize and property destruction, plus the drinking and smoking and running away from cops stuff. Apparently there were other kids going in this place and posting it on social media, which is how they heard about it.

It really put a pall over all the end of year senior events like prom and graduation. Plus I've allowed very little freedom since the arrest. It's been a sobering life lesson for my kid and I hope put them solidly on a good path moving forward for college and beyond.

I really appreciate everyone who offered recommendations, support and sympathy. Parenting doesn't get easier as we get older, they still find ways to throw something new at you. [/quote]

Parenting is not for sissies. Hang in there, OP.

When my DH was about the same age, he got caught in similar circumstances. Arrested, but charges were ultimately dropped. For reasons that are unclear but seemed based on good advice, he and his parents opted not to get the incident expunged.

I'm here to tell you that it didn't affect his college, he was able to get and hold excellent jobs, he is allowed to coach our kid's sport, etc. He has to check "yes" to the "have you ever been arrested?" question, but he includes an explanation of the incident (and at this age, generally gets a friendly pat on the back and a "me too, buddy" from whoever is compiling background check info. Although he still went on to do some of the requisite ridiculous stuff in college and as a young adult, he became much choosier about his friends. And much more willing to bail out if a night seemed like it was really headed off the rails.

He also remains astounded and grateful that his parents were so supportive and forgiving. Sure, his mom blew her top that first night. But what he really remembers is the long-term way they helped him get through it.[/quote]

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