Reply to You meet someone you like through OLD. How soon would you consider sleeping with them?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t go on second or third dates with people I’m not interested in- ever. I’m an attractive F in her 40s. Most men I screen out with a coffee date. If they make it to a proper dinner date, definitely some making out/get a feel for them sexually. Third date id sleep with them. I’m not interested in ONS as emotional and sexual vulnerability and actual want are my turn ons. It’s easy to match with men when you’re pretty- harder to find ones you want to get naked with. [/quote]

It appears you have no interest finding more about their personality before “test driving”. I’m the same - never see past coffee date those I’m not interested.  But let’s say I was sexually interested at first date: my initial positive assessment of his attractiveness may actually change after 5-6 dates based on what he was saying, how he behaved etc. 
It’s more important to me to gauge personality first - how he reciprocates emotionally, if we have common interests or on same life stages, how he speaks of other women etc. 
I would have to sleep with too many guys if I used sexual vulnerability as main criteria. Couple dates is not enough time to get to know the person [/quote]

I have very high standards- for sexual attraction and work/play /income/lifestyle compatibility(which means similar custody schedules if kids still in the house) so I’m not in danger of sleeping with too many guys. Like I said I don’t go on many third dates. In the six years I’ve been dating all of them led to relationships, so maybe my picker is more honed in to what I want. I don’t ever want to marry or cohabitate so the above mentioned things matter most and can be pretty well figured out through 3 dates and weeks of texting or calls [/quote]

Not sure how you can figure out all about their lifestyle income and hobbies all in 3 dates but ok[/quote]

It’s remarkably easy by one’s 40s. People
Who take great care of themselves and have income to spend on maintenance look drastically different than those who don’t. Cars. Zip codes. Hobbies.  Friends, clubs, career, sports vacation spots and their social media make it easy to verify. Remember it’s not just three dates. It’s at least a month of texting or FaceTiming etc by a third date. You can get to know someone quite well through a month of regular communication. Well enough to begin a relationship- not marry or anything. Duh. [/quote]

Ah, here you go - I don't text/Face Time for a month prior to first date. I just do a short video check-in if I have questions about his profile. if he's super attractive and profile well written no video check-in. The first RL intro is max a week from matching them first. I never maintain texting with people I don't know[/quote]

So it's about a month for both you and me, we just communicate differently: I prefer several real life dates (5-6)[/quote]

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