Reply to I don’t really miss my life before kids

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Posts like this are so wretched and smug. Implicit in them is that lives without kids are empty and meaningless and that being a parent makes you a superior human being.

In fact, many parents are among the most selfish people on the planet because they only think of themselves and their kids as an extension of themselves.

We have four adult children. Three are married, and two of the three have children. The third married child doesn’t want kids, and the fourth doesn’t want either to get married or have kids.  All four are happy with their choices and supportive of their siblings’ choices, and we are equally proud of all four.  But there is no question that the two without children are doing more to help the broader society than the two with children - or, for that matter, than we ever could because we had children ourselves.

So, bottom line: stop patting yourself on the back and stop implicitly judging everyone else. You’re not that special.

[/quote]

Op here. I wrote this post after reading Fleishman is in trouble, with the character Libby pining for her life before kids and missing who she was before that. I just truly could not relate to what she was missing or why she was so unhappy, hence the post. [/quote]

I felt the same about Fleischman is in trouble. There’s definitely an idea in the cultural zeitgeist (for upper middle class women) that parenting is oppressive drudgery. I don’t doubt that some women experience that, and I think they should feel able to express those feelings. But I love my life as a parent. (But I’m also glad I got to experience relatively carefree young adulthood too.) [/quote]

I also feel this way. I love parenting so much and truly enjoy it as a whole. I can’t relate to the messaging that I’m supposed to be miserable, annoyed, and wish I was childless. [/quote]

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