Reply to My moms text to brother seem like slap on face

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here- I read text because I wondered how she was telling my brother about their visit and the independent living places we toured.  I did want to see what they were saying about me. I confess to that. 
  A year ago, I helped her set up Uber and a text from my brother popped up while I was setting it up- critism of me- I was really caught off guard.  So I could see text string  she had sent to him first and it was asking him to weigh in on something about me.  I was hurt but I know they favor him. They have him the executor of their estate- the power of attorney - etc. I accepted that as old school thinking about a son. Although we are equally accomplished professionally and personally.
  But some other comments from him are entirely dismissive of me- and just unnecessary. So it is a sensitive issue. So I did want to see how she discussed this visit.
  I’m literally helping them to tour retirement places-  hosting them as we usually do for every holiday-  he of course had only asked/ invited them for Xmas but once in 25 years.
 So just hurts my feelings- but in more mature aspect, that’s not a situation I want- to help guide them and do the heavy lifting while my brother has critical analysis of everything I do based on her asking for his opinion!  [/quote]

I’m going to be a little harsh here, but the biggest lesson you got is to stop reading her texts.   You sound like little kids arguing and snooping over who gets the most attention.

My parents are much closer to my two other siblings.  It’s not a secret.  They live by one and talk incessantly about the other.  I am not even offended by any of this anymore.  But when it comes time to make real decisions about their medical or financial future, I’m the one they call.  They know I’m the most level headed in hard situations even though we aren’t the closest.  Maybe that’s you and why they want to live near you and not their son.  It’s up to you to decide if you are okay with this type of relationship.  [/quote]

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