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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We pay for grades. It works and - frankly - is more akin to the real world where high performers get paid more in the workplace (exceptions abound, of course).

Big drop in compensation from an A to a B+. We have bonuses too for perfect GPA and certain milestones on SAT, class rank, etc. My kid decides what his time is worth....and he seems to like money.

It's nice because I'm not actually pressuring and following up. He wants to make some coin and pushes himself. Win-win for us.  [/quote]

But if your child was not capable of the “top dollar” performance, but absolutely trying his best…what would you do? Or if you saw his mental health suffering, to please you two?[/quote]

First, the kid isn't "pleasing" us. His time and effort are worth money and we quantify it. Just like when you're in your career. So, in the end, he knows that if he hits an A in chemistry, that's going to get him the money to get those shoes he really wants. It's a virtuous cycle of cause-and-effect. You work hard, you score well, you get the reward. It's a self-regulating dopamine cycle.

We've always supplemented with our kid. Had some learning disabilities in the ECE years that required therapies (both provided by school and paid out of pocket). Have used tutors pretty regularly throughout MS and HS to help master material. Our kid has definitely struggled at times; when that happens we bring in a tutor. But it requires your kid asking for help.

We've told him that we are happy to spend on tutoring or supplemental materials if it helps him master the material. You're incentivized to ask for help if an "A" comes with a big pay day. An honors or AP class gets a bigger payout so you take a tougher set of classes.

The virtuous cycle continues. If he gets a B, well he lives with that. And learns to make do with less - just like in real life.[/quote]

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