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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If I were a grandparent of the kids of a DCUM mom I’d never want to help any of you either.  You’re all so nasty when it comes to your parents.  You don’t deserve their help. [/quote]

Same.  So much complaining about their "toxic" parents; this forum is dominated by whining adult children.

That said, we are happy to be able to help with some child care and desire to build relations with our grandchildren.  What has been tough for us (& I don't think has been mentioned yet):the kids are so often sick that we are constantly exposed to all sorts of viruses and when you are a senior, it's very hard to avoid/recover from.   So please be mindful that the grandparents immune systems are often weaker than those of the parents.

[/quote]

I think that’s totally fine.  But don’t expect anyone to inconvenience themselves to come to you. Especially if you’re sick because that’s no fun.[/quote]

Great, so the grandchildren get their grandparents sick because the kids have poor hygiene and spread germs.  And then the grandparents should be expected to be ignored if and when they need help.  Sounds fair. [/quote]

No, the grandparents are staying away while the kids are young because they are scared of germs.  So they are useless to parents with young children, which also happens to be the only time grandparents are at all useful.

So grandparents offer no child care and their kids offer no elder care.

If you’re not okay with that, then I suggest you risk your health and get to work taking care of your grandkids.  If you’re okay with that, like in my family, then more power to you.[/quote]

Have you always had a quid pro quo relationship with family or others in your life?[/quote]

It’s called boundaries.  Try it sometime.[/quote]

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