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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would tell him that if he voluntarily commits himself to rehab, when he comes out, he will be able to move back into the house and you will support him in getting his life back on track.

That would be my concession.  I think he has already deprived you of one son (himself), and [b]you don't want him to influence his brother so you lose both sons. [/b] He needs to be committed to getting clean and then you will welcome him back home.[/quote]
OP, pay attention to the bolded.  One of my cousins was an opiate addict who lived at home and shared a room with his younger brother.  The younger brother also became addicted to opiates.  The oldest OD'ed at age 23.  The youngest spent the years after his brothers death in an addicted haze, with several half-hearted rehab stints.  He, too, ended up dying in a vehicle accident.  It was the night before he was supposed to start another round of rehab.  Addicts often decide to have a "last hurrah" right before heading into rehab.  He took a boatload of pills and then got behind the wheel.

I'm not saying that if the older brother wasn't allowed to stay at home that the younger brother would not have become addicted, but having this sort of disease in the home isn't healthy for an adolescent.  OP, I know you want to help your oldest child, but you also can't risk what damage may be caused to your youngest.  You can only allow the addict back if he agrees to treatment.  You can not simply allow him back home.  Right now, you fear losing one.  Imagine what it would be like to fear losing two.[/quote]

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