Reply to Lying about Divorce

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[quote=Anonymous]	Don’t fall for the old “we need to wait until the kids graduate high school” routine, op. Even if that’s true, she doesn’t need to be dating and she doesn’t need to be lying. 
Believe me, she pegged you as a mark and now you feel bad because you are probably a nice person, and nice people tend to let a lot of things go they shouldn’t because “we all need a second chance” “Maybe I didn’t understand or don’t remember what she told me early on” “Of course she’d not reveal anything that personal on a *date*” “she’s so nice, and after all, it took my brother weeks before he finally told me he was getting divorced” “it will be resolved soon” “we’re not planning to get married right now so what difference does it make”, “Maybe I’m just what she needs to get back on track, isn’t it great God put us at the same time and place so we could meet?” it’s very easy to get onto that path if the circumstances are set up properly. 
I‘d end it with her and I’d tell her why, “I don’t date married women, and I don’t date liars, and I *really* don’t date people who lie to me for a few months setting up an environment where I like and trust them only to release a bomb on a beautiful summer evening, a bomb that you can’t help fix. You can’t get divorced for her you know, the dissolving of the marriage is between her and her husband and that isn’t you.  I’d end it in public and I may record the conversation, the old “if they’ll do it with you, they’l do it to you” and you don’t want her having the ability to say you threatened her or got violent. Then I’d hang onto the recording for some time until I was sure she was really out of your life, no friend requests, no texts to “say hi” none of that.

For the person who said “It’s not a big deal if you like each other” this isn’t a disability or a difference in food preference, or that he likes to ski and she has never seen snow. All those can be sorted out, my husband has sleep apnea and according to this board it’s the most unsexy device ever made. Know what, I don’t care, a cranky chronically tired husband is lots worse then his cpap. I’m sure his cpap wouldn’t have been a problem if he’d set it up on our first night together, I wouldn’t have wanted to spend the night with him if I didn’t at least like him a little.  OP’s girlfriend is a deceitful woman who knew exactly what she was doing and who she was doing it with. Run, op, run.  
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