Reply to DS22's girlfriend is over ALL. THE. TIME.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]“Your feelings matter but my feelings matter too. I am feeling like I can never relax in my own house because you have guests over all day every day. We are going to compromise because I know you like having her over. She is welcome here X days per week for X hours per day. She will need to leave by X. If you do not respect this boundary, she will no longer be welcome here.”[/quote]

OP here. Thank you! I like the first few sentences and understand the rationale behind saying x number of hours per day, but in reality I would be the one enforcing that and I'd really like to take off my bad-cop hat (and not make her feel unwelcome, which she probably does when I remind him it's time to take her home). [/quote]
Wanting to take off your bad cop hat is why you aren’t getting anywhere. You’ll have to choose between making your peace with her being there or being the bad guy (or rather, perceived as such) and enforcing your boundaries. He’s not going to get why you don’t want her there (and honestly, a lot of people would be fine with it, you just aren’t one of them, which is ok) so you have to make it happen the way you want or live with what he wants. All of the advice here is saying the same thing, in so many words.[/quote]

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