Reply to I don’t like my daughter. I know this won’t ever change-

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Mom? Is that you? Where should I sent the invoice for a lifetime of therapy for daring to be a child and you not being equipped to be a parent?

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I am automatically skeptical of poor me moms posting here, especially ones who speak so freely of not liking their children. I suspect most lack all understanding of child psychology/development and will lie to themselves their whole lives, giving themselves a free pass for causing the critical ego wounds in early childhood that disrupted their children’s attachment process and lead to a lifetime of attachment issues - which manifest in lots of self destructive ways.

Of course it’s all the child’s fault. S/he has a difficult personality. S/he was born with it. Has nothing whatsoever to do with hypercritical and cold mothering. Never that.[/quote]

I kind of felt this way about my mom, and there was definitely favoritism, which can ruin a family permanently. Some moms are stuck in their extremely outdated and damaging ways.  My mom and I grew closer with age and distance, thankfully. My kids adore her.

OP, consider that it can be both nature and nurture. I am closer to certain children than others, and it is definitely based on personality type.  For example, one really difficult baby turned out happy and healthy (thank God, seriously), and one chill baby turned out like your daughter - so far.  We are humans, constantly growing and evolving.  Let her.

I love my difficult child(ren) to the moon and back, and actually like and respect them, too.  I hope they know that. We must work on them knowing that. [/quote]

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