Reply to I make my kids separate meals from us for pretty much every meal and I think it's better

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. I am definitely not saying that everyone has to do it my way. I'm just saying that you never hear people say "just make your kids separate foods, its fine" and I have found it is fine.

But I've been told a million times, by pediatricians, teachers, friends, family, "Just feed them what you eat!" As though all kids just eat what adults eat no issue. But my kids have never done this, and when we've tried to do family dinners without substitutions, or even minimizing substitutions, it just leads to conflict. So I just decided that what matters is that they eat regularly healthy meals that hit all their nutritional needs, and it's not actually that important that they eat the exact same foods.

Obviously if your kid happily eats whatever you eat, this isn't an issue. But serving different food is way better than either arguing over eating the family meal or watching them eat the least nutritious version of that meal when there are plenty of nutritious foods they WILL eat.

People act like serving your kids "kid food" at a meal is a failure and it's really not. I personally think it would be a failure if my my kid was eating nothing but tortillas/rolls/bread/rice and milk for dinner every night, which is what would happen if I didn't offer an alternative to our adult foods.[/quote]

How about the dozens if not hundreds of people who would say NOTHING TO YOU AT ALL ABOUT HOW TO RAISE YOUR KIDS, because we would never dream of offering unsolicited parenting advice! You haven’t heard “just do X” because real life is not DCUM, and well-mannered adults do what works for them, live their lives, and don’t offer advice unless specifically ASKED.[/quote]

What are you talking about, people offer unsolicited parenting advice all the time. On DCUM a lot of the advice is actually solicited, even if it is also often rudely delivered. But this is neither here nor there on the question of whether you are required to feed your kids the food you yourself eat. This is a conversation, not a pissing match, and you are the one being rude by shouting in ALL CAPS. Dial it down.[/quote]

I’ve heard at least a dozen of my friends complain about how their kids are picky eaters, often as an invitation to commiserate. I murmer along and kind of use my now-adult cousin as a point of reassurance, “The pickiest eater I’ve ever known is a Navy pilot!” That kind of thing. But unless I am pressed, I don’t offer that my kids have never been picky (though there are certainly some foods they prefer and others they will taste and try, but will not eat a full portion), because that’s not helpful and because I don’t need to make every conversation about me. And no, my friends and family don’t offer unsolicited advice; like, ever. Maybe my mom will occasionally say something borderline advice-y, but not my friends. It’s more like someone throws out a point of commiseration. If someone has a particular question, we will ask it, but that’s rare.

The point is, OP is acting like people have been withholding this secret point of advice because only she herself has worked out this amazing strategy, and…that just ain’t it. I don’t care what my friends’ kids’ eat, and I don’t care what OP’s kids eat. I just think it’s off-base for her to be essentially telling us all how her way is best. No thanks, I’m not a short-order cook. I make dinner, and my kids eat it. We don’t need OP’s “better” way.[/quote]

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