Reply to Young AC tells friends that dad is a recovering alcoholic

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Even today she was sending me trauma tiktoks of 20 year olds crying into the camera about their trauma.  All white American young women of course.  A month ago, AC and her roommate had a disagreement apparently about dishes and kitchen stuff.  AC messaged me that she is now receiving trauma from her roommate.  I said "what do you mean receiving trauma". AC then explained that roommate was meant to empty DW and didn't and they were arguing about chores and who's turn.  But this is very strong language throwing the word trauma around.  Sorry but trauma is a very serious word for very serious situations.[/quote]

“Larla, please stop sending these to me. Let’s set up a weekly phone check in. I’m happy to call you on Sunday evenings unless you want to suggest a different day.”

Stop being a place where she can park this stuff. [/quote]

But tell her WHY. Tell her what's wrong with the crap she is spewing.[/quote]

Actually I wouldn’t suggest telling her why. That is an invitation to engaging and arguing around this. Basically it’s applying that “grey rock” approach where you give minimal response to the drama. I think that OP has been allowing this to continue and will try to reason with dd. It’s time to pull back and “grey rock.”
Here’s a link to describe what that is if you’ve never heard of it: https://mywellbeing.com/for-therapists/grey-rock-technique
[/quote]

Grey rock is evil. I would use grey rock if I were stuck in a subway car with a mentally ill homeless person looking for eye contact, not with my own child. OP is her mother. She should have taught her these things along the way. She can't just block her DD out now because she's annoying. She has to teach her.

This "grey rock" is some kind of BS. It's sickening.[/quote]

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